Last night I spent another night conversing and sharing secrets of the song with Jann Arden. It was the same dream I dreamt last week. Funny how dreams can repeat themselves over and over and over. I guess it's true, a dream is just a wish your heart makes, and for a little while, you're heart is happy! Funny how a dream can do that, not that my heart isn't happy most of the time. I'm lucky, it is. It's just that there are things that are unlikely ever going to take place, that a part of you beleives would really have an incredible impact on your life, and for those moments before you wake, you're given just the faintest taste of what it would be like. Helps you wake up in a pretty darn good mood!
Actually, having the opportunity to meet Jann Arden isn't really a dream at all for me anymore. It was for a long time. I love her writing. I've attended every concert she's played in Manitoba, and have every one of her albums in my scattered collection. She's held firm and moved forward in a world where many tried and gave up, and she just keeps getting deeper, and funnier, and more authentic I think. I've even always been able to relate to her weight issues, we definitely share them. Then darn her, Jann Arden moved ahead and shed all those pounds...so here I am convincing myself that if an idol can do it when she's only two years younger than I, then darnit there is hope...and on I struggle again. And guess what, I may not be down the 50 pounds that Jann is able to claim, but I've seen 18 dissappear...and I figure this is my year to have the rest follow.
Anyhow, back to my story. I did have the opportunity to meet Jann Arden last October. In promising myself that I'm not going to miss opportunities to learn more, immerse myself more, and enjoy myself more when it comes to my music, I signed up for the Western Canadian Music Awards that were held in Winnipeg. Shortly before the week kicked off, I received the email calling for volunteers, so Cec and I talked it out and thought what the heck....let's do something just a little outside the realm that we're used to. Weirdly, the two of us were signed up to drive people back and forth from the airport. I had the incredible experience of driving Peter Jenner, who managed Pink Floyd and countless other bands. You're driving along thinking "my God, I'm escorting Peter Jenner around" and Peter Jenner is riding along thinking "My God, a farmer from Lavenham has my life in her hands!!". But in reality, he was wonderful, and interesting, and interested in what this farmer had to say. Quite the experience. Both Cec and I had the opportunity to meet really amazing people whose paths I know, had we not volunteered, would never have crossed.
Part of the week was a Songwriters session, where, you guessed it, Jann Arden was one of the panel. And low and behold, I had the fortune to have her listen to and critique one of my songs when it was randomly selected from the basket. Oh, I can not tell you what an idiot I must of looked like with my eyes brimming with tears, realizing the things that can happen when you put yourself out there and follow your dreams. Jann was very kind and supportive and encouraging, and told me to always keep writing. I wish there'd been time to tell her that I couldn't imagine ever not writing again. I wish I'd had time to thank her for all the times her stuff has got me through. I wish I'd had a chance to share with her how, when my first husband was 3/4 of the way through that awful battle he fought with cancer, I'd dropped him off for chemo then ran errands. "Blood Red Cherry" had just come out, so I picked it up, popped it in the cd player in the van, and headed back to the hospital. Heading back to the hospital, preparing myself for what I knew was ahead of us weekly post-chemo, wondering how long either one of us could keep this up the song "Piece of it all" started playing as the first selection on random...with the opening line "Right now, somebody loves you". I had to pull over, I couldn't stop the tears and I couldn't see through them. I so needed to be reminded of that at that moment, and the song did.
But I never got to tell Jann that either. I guess that's what dreams are for, telling all the folks who have passed through your life the things that you didn't manage to say in their presence. However, I did get an autograph, and I did get a picture of the two of us together, both of which I now can proudly display with my "Love is the only soldier" poster. And who knows, someday, maybe the opporunity will come again. Life is full of miracles!
So now I'm off, to dream a little dream...who knows who I'll share tonights conversation with!
L
www.musicwriter.ca
No comments:
Post a Comment